The Caregiver Pact

A significant portion of us are caregivers.    Our roles can be more than just taking of children; it's the chronological or terminally ill, those with special needs, elderly, etc that we lovingly care for.   If you are not now then most likely you have been or will be- a care giver.  In any capacity of caregiving you are sacrificing and in continual out pour. In some circumstances we would love to change why we are in the role but would never change our choice to be it. Because you are pouring out, you need to be putting it back in.  I am all too aware how saying this is easier than actually making it happen. I am a wife, step mom, mom, aunt, child care giver, teacher,  manager of those with special needs and medical conditions. I am over reached majority of the time.  We have so much as it is, its just one more thing to put effort in. 

We must do it.

 For us and for those we care for. You need to make a pact for yourself so you can make the most of you and your caregiver self.   It takes intention, creativity, and setting priorities.  It's not impossible.

Pact one is for your body.  The physical toll taken affect more than the physical self. Sleep is priority one. Best case is sleeping a good eight hours or more as needed.  If that doesn't happen, naps. They are not just for preschoolers. Sleep deprivation infiltrates EVERYTHING- from how your body functions to brain functions. What you can handle or not. Ability to persevere. EVERYTHING.  You need sleep. What you eat is priority two in this pact. Low fat and sugar, high protein and veggies. Unhealthy fats and unhealthy sugars negatively impact your ability to function.  There are good fats that are imperative like avocados, coconut oil, olive oil, eggs, etc. Those in appropriate amount give your body and brain the boost it needs.  You need the right sugar from complex grains.. Quick energy. A small cup of coffee is life changing. Add that too.  Sleep and good nutrition is better for your overall health and will be a major contributor to your second pact...

One of the best parts of parent-care-giving is how cute and quiet they are when they sleep.
 Especially the quiet.
Then finding a bed yourself.

...Your mind. Sanity may be in short supply or non existent some days. Or all days.  We need to be intentional in care for our minds as equally as we are with our bodies.  In pouring to your physical body enhances your mental health.   It affects our decision making, emotions, and stamina. Your mind is immensely powerful. When not cared for, it can be your enemy. Your pact to your mind is to declutter it. Meditation, prayer, coloring, journaling, support group or friend. You need at least one of these things. I use all of them! We need some where to exhale our love, frustration, exhaustion, victories, and so forth. We need a safe place to inhale grace, comfort, strength, and pebbles of sanity. Release and renew your brain. Part of this pact is acknowledging and setting limitations. We are humans. Super humans, yet very human. We have limitations. A rubber band can only go so far. It does snap. Ask my family when my rubber band snapped. And who did it. Know and advocate your limitations.

The last pact is to honor your spirit or soul. Whichever you choose. We are designed to be connected and caregiving has a way to isolate us. We must be intentional to connect for our health and caregiving. Seek and accept help then take opportunities outside of your caregiving space to connect with community(ies). Share the burden and get your head out of your ass. When you are isolated your head has a way of getting stuck there. It takes effort and strength to get out and connect. Gives you perspective.   It is possible to do something. Especially if you are accepting help. We must connect ourselves to other selves. The more you connect, the more support you find and discover value in your unique purpose.

It took creative planning, coordinating with effort but we had a blast connecting with our immediate community and larger local community.  It gave us community with purpose.  It was within our limitation of a couple of hours to be present and within our ability to hand out candy.  And our children enjoy an early candy gorging.

Care and pour love into your self to keep our care and love momentum.

Make this pact.

Namaste💞