Recently we decided to join a community group specific to our ghost daughter. As time approached for the meeting she began to breathe heavier and her personal space boundary became wider. She is excited but the nerves were too much. Everything turned out fine; we had a game plan. This is going to be a great thing for her. We just have some hurdles. For the ghosts and ghost children, advocating is twenty-four hour immersion of tactical decisions and communication. It's exhausting. Being a part of a community can help with this and extremely important for mental health and soul health. We need to this. There are ways to make connecting smoother and intentionally beneficial on both ends.
Family and community can be potentially strong support system. In specifically advocating for your ghost child with family, I would start with unloading concerns and explanations to choice family members. Be choosy. They may be able to support you the best and guide in handling other members. Share what you know and update. Having that built in community is essential for your well being and for your ghost child. Let them physically help you not just emotionally. Ghost children can have extraordinary needs and extra hands are comfort. They may be "your" ghost child but it benefits everyone when extra willing aid steps in. Advocating in the community is similar. Pick those few people especially if they are working with you or your child directly. Educate where you can but keep it simple. As time goes on you can add on to their understanding. Most people I find are open. I cannot be more grateful for the help our family and community provides us in multiple ways. We were cautiously open at first; however, now we are far more comfortable and bold. This has connected us to various ghost families with stories and guidance in our journey. Take that chance to connect for your and their soul health. Every once and awhile there is that person who needs an adjustment. Do so legally. You have rights to speak up, then it may be time to move on. Focus on those who wish to understand and engage.
Advocating for your ghost child in family gatherings is a special wild animal on it's own. I dreaded them for a time not due to any one specific. Rather it was a fire storm situation for our ghost child and out of the ordinary schedules. We have come a long way in this past year. The first step we took is to communicate with those chosen family members ahead of time. Is there a game plan? What may be an issue and how can that be addressed? What provisions need to be made? What is the time limit for your ghost child? Get specific in your plans. Also be prepared with a schedule if possible, materials, and back up strategies. Be prepared to stand up for your ghost child. Derogatory comments are never acceptable from anyone at anytime. You can take a couple of different paths. One is to educate and hope understanding will bring change. The other is to firmly express where the line was crossed and why it is not permissible. Then disengage. Any extra energy to escalate the situation will only hurt you and your loved one/ghost child. If the other party's response is not respectful and harmful, leave. Be prepared with your tactic and escape plan. It's not advice I wish to give, but it's unfortunately required for some people. This applies to large community gatherings- "copy" and "paste."
With family or community the most powerful tool you have is YOUR voice. It's wonderful to have support when others speak on your behalf; however, the strongest message comes from the person themselves. Teach your ghost self or ghost child to advocate rather than someone else. As we go along our journey, our ghost child is educated on her disorder and accommodations. She learns about all her quirks and is encouraged to speak for herself. She is encouraged and given appropriate expectations with reasons as to why it's so important for ghost child to speak up. It's significant to note that not everyone wants to hear what you have to say. It only hurts you to engage in an argument or continue to "change their mind." Let karma sort that shit out. Move on. Teach this too.
When you begin to build allies in the community and with family an unloading begins. Breathe. Your or their quirks become less of an obstacle and more of a contribution. Your voice allows a connection on their end and walls to crumble on your end. For your soul and mental health, take these simple steps and find enjoyable connection.
Pick Fellow Advocates and Be Bold
Family and community can be potentially strong support system. In specifically advocating for your ghost child with family, I would start with unloading concerns and explanations to choice family members. Be choosy. They may be able to support you the best and guide in handling other members. Share what you know and update. Having that built in community is essential for your well being and for your ghost child. Let them physically help you not just emotionally. Ghost children can have extraordinary needs and extra hands are comfort. They may be "your" ghost child but it benefits everyone when extra willing aid steps in. Advocating in the community is similar. Pick those few people especially if they are working with you or your child directly. Educate where you can but keep it simple. As time goes on you can add on to their understanding. Most people I find are open. I cannot be more grateful for the help our family and community provides us in multiple ways. We were cautiously open at first; however, now we are far more comfortable and bold. This has connected us to various ghost families with stories and guidance in our journey. Take that chance to connect for your and their soul health. Every once and awhile there is that person who needs an adjustment. Do so legally. You have rights to speak up, then it may be time to move on. Focus on those who wish to understand and engage.
Have A Game Plan
Advocating for your ghost child in family gatherings is a special wild animal on it's own. I dreaded them for a time not due to any one specific. Rather it was a fire storm situation for our ghost child and out of the ordinary schedules. We have come a long way in this past year. The first step we took is to communicate with those chosen family members ahead of time. Is there a game plan? What may be an issue and how can that be addressed? What provisions need to be made? What is the time limit for your ghost child? Get specific in your plans. Also be prepared with a schedule if possible, materials, and back up strategies. Be prepared to stand up for your ghost child. Derogatory comments are never acceptable from anyone at anytime. You can take a couple of different paths. One is to educate and hope understanding will bring change. The other is to firmly express where the line was crossed and why it is not permissible. Then disengage. Any extra energy to escalate the situation will only hurt you and your loved one/ghost child. If the other party's response is not respectful and harmful, leave. Be prepared with your tactic and escape plan. It's not advice I wish to give, but it's unfortunately required for some people. This applies to large community gatherings- "copy" and "paste."
Find Your Voice. Teach Them to Find Their Voice.
With family or community the most powerful tool you have is YOUR voice. It's wonderful to have support when others speak on your behalf; however, the strongest message comes from the person themselves. Teach your ghost self or ghost child to advocate rather than someone else. As we go along our journey, our ghost child is educated on her disorder and accommodations. She learns about all her quirks and is encouraged to speak for herself. She is encouraged and given appropriate expectations with reasons as to why it's so important for ghost child to speak up. It's significant to note that not everyone wants to hear what you have to say. It only hurts you to engage in an argument or continue to "change their mind." Let karma sort that shit out. Move on. Teach this too.
When you begin to build allies in the community and with family an unloading begins. Breathe. Your or their quirks become less of an obstacle and more of a contribution. Your voice allows a connection on their end and walls to crumble on your end. For your soul and mental health, take these simple steps and find enjoyable connection.
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| Namaste and Blessing in Your Community Connections |
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